The August Twenty Ones of my Life

I recently watched Boy and Kris' episode yesterday morning about Modern Day Heroes... They say that everyone has a Ninoy inside. Well, for some reason I felt a bit of a lump in my throat whenever they flash scenes from his U.S. speech or the Tarmac scene.



The throat lump, is not only because I am really moved by the scenes, but the sheer frustration that goes with it. Questions like, Where are we now? Where is this country headed? Will the situation get any better?

There is so much idealism in the youth but, sad to say, idealism cannot feed a hungry stomach,it cannot buy you the latest gadget nor provide tons of load for your cellphone; one has to learn to ride the tides of situations that catches you in order to survive. Trends come and go, and after that what?

Don't get me wrong, I admire their effort to instill charity and awareness through wearable goods; but merely buying a shirt won't be enough to instill Nationality and absolute love and passion for our Country, it should be ingrained in each person's very soul- and how? Through their families,exposure immersions from schools or organizations and through shared history.

I was in third grade when I heard about a certain "Ninoy" who died at MIA in school; the poor guy was shot and the military was on red alert- but good thing (or so I thought), they already killed the gunman. When I arrived home, my parents were shocked, and I kept hearing them that it was planned and a certain this and that was undoubtedly the mastermind. Hours after, we watched thousands of people on T.V. surrounding the truck which carry Ninoy Aquino's casket on it. The scene was so overwhelming, I bugged my parents about who this person is, and why is he treated as such. I know for a fact, in an eight year old's mind- that Marcos was a bad leader since he wouldn't even lift a finger to find people who disappear or get killed-since they we're against the government, that every one who talks against the government or the Marcos family would be sent to jail.

Two years after that, one February morning, my friend and I saw two army tanks speeding Limay's Roman Highway. It was clearly headed for Mariveles; earlier, there were talks amongst teachers that there was something happening in Manila. I grew worried, my dad was already working in Leyte since the fertilizer plant in Limay was shut down by the Marcoses. I went home and saw my mom, intently listening to DZRB Radio Veritas- there was no T.V. coverage since channel 4 was shut down too. Our neighbors were talking about the possible escape plan should everything went haywire and a full blown civil war would erupt. We all waited, and prayed. Cardinal Sin called for us Catholics to go and protect Crame, but obviously, even if we wanted to go, we were so far from Manila. We prayed the rosary instead. And then, a few days after, we heard that Marcos fled.

Things went rosy after that, our first taste of Pinoy pride-free at last! There were several coup attempts to topple the Aquino government but all failed.

After the Aquino administration came the Ramos Presidency,there were issues such as the oil price hike and the like. This is when I had my first taste of mass mobilization, classroom walk-outs, and rallies. Oddly enough, one general meeting among cigarette smoke hazed members of our organization; I realized, we are against monopolist oligarchs like Lucio Tan and yet they patronize his cigarettes and gin. We we're against American bases and yet we wear Levi's, Hanes shirts and Converse shoes which are clearly imported from that country. All talk, yet the very essence of our causes are not ingrained within ourselves.

Then came the Estrada Administration-we were sitting and following the impeachment hearing of Pres. Estrada-then, came the second envelope...we were all disappointed, the case wouldn't prosper due to mere technicality-again, people went out to the streets.

Almost a year ago, when I was 7 months pregnant with my daughter, there were talks that our 60 year old municipal hall will be torn down to pieces to give way with the new. The new municipal hall is modern looking, located at the back of the old one; the new structure was hastily put up where our former public market once stood.

My mother and I were disappointed, it would have been great if the idea was scrapped and just convert it to a museum and a library-for everybody. After all, the structure is still sturdy and it had survived typhoons, earthquakes, the Mt. Pinatubo ash fall and other natural calamities. The structure also served as an evacuation center for people who were victims of flood and fire.
No doubt this old municipal hall can still take care of it's people for generations, compared to the new one-which cost us taxpayers millions of pesos.

I conducted interviews on several people who went to our store just to get their pulse on the matter; 90% of the people I talked to felt that it will be more practical to convert the structure into a museum and a library. The other 10% are cynical and would not even care a bit, since they know that the pockets are mightier than social service.

Thanks to my Franciscan education, I composed a letter suggesting what we have in mind and conducted a signature campaign. The signatures came, I furnished copies for the town council and the mayor- approaching the latter who later pointed that the basis of his decisions are whatever the town council decides upon.

I was given an opportunity to talk to them ( only I heard from another well meaning councilor that the decision has already been made-before I had the chance to be heard) By my lonesome I argued why they should not tear down the old municipal hall and rather convert it to a museum and library... As predicted, the decision had already been made, a few months after, it was torn down. I never regretted my move, I would rather see myself lose while fighting rather than not fight or do anything at all; I did what I can as a citizen of this country-failed or not, I did my duty.

August 21 is not just a date or a holiday. It signifies awakening from the long slumber of watching politicians do their thing, would you rather sit and watch and not care; or rise and do something- even in your little way?

Go ahead, buy the shirts- but may that also remind you that your country awaits for your move even if you buy the shirts or not.

still on love

My husband once told me, "it doesn't matter if we're not together on Valentine's Day, what's important is, whenever we're together-it feels like Valentine's day..." my heart melted-like putty-and we're not even arguing-just talking; it's just one of those mundane talks that sometimes makes you think and thank God you have this person beside you whom you'll love to grow old with.

I never thought married life is such a thrilling experience, all I knew was-after two or three years the enchantment will be gone or so I thought...

My husband sent me this text message yesterday and it read:

Love gives us reasons to do things
that would otherwise be perceived as
crazy.
And justify things that others would see as absurd.
It can even make me a poet...

I shook my head...after 10 years this guy is still nuts- I love it :)

Lost loves

I'm missing something...

I found it one time, but I have to let it go...

depressing yes, frustrating... kinda

I just saw the other day the picture of one of my loves,

I can still remember that day-when I fell in love with it...

the day I can pronounce Kellog's

And that's their Honey smackers- I wonder if they still make it to this day?

Ugh, lost loves...

renewing toes

The title of this blog should be renewing ties, yet I miss-typed ties for toes- thanks to my daughter's penchant of kicking the keyboard rest; which reminds me, motherhood changes lots of things.

I used to have a weekly manicure and pedicure when I was single, then, it became an every- other- week- ritual when I got married, then I became content doing it myself-once a month-now, with two kids- all went kaput ( except for cleaning it daily with a used toothbrush during showers).

I re-examined my battle-weary toes, yup, they're crooked, homely clean but lacking the verve and color it deserves- in short, boringly drab. Now what to do? I should get a foot spa and add some color to it, question is, when? Good question... I wear my baby, and she can't stand waiting for hours without jumping around and messing about( she's teething, and LOVES to gnaw on things) her dad loves the idea about the foot spa thing, but our problem is the schedule- he comes home only during his days off ( he's working in Manila- two and a half to three hours drive from our place) I often set the idea aside whenever he's home( irregardless of countless prodding) since I prefer to bond with them at home.

So again, when? Ask for a home service ?- nah, too expensive...
I'll settle for the used toothbrush and my pedicure set instead
- homely clean, mommy toes :)